Here goes...
My eating disorder began when I was in the 8th grade. In the 7th grade I had gotten a little bit chubby (as a result of hitting puberty) and I grew to be increasingly uncomfortable in my body. At the beginning of 8th grade I cut out sweets and excessive carbs, but hardly thought about food and never counted a calorie. I dropped 12 pounds! (136-124)
I felt and looked so great, that I strove for more. That spring, I began counting calories and becoming pretty obsessive about food. My parents noticed, but they didn't take it very seriously since I was still at a perfectly healthy weight.
By Easter I weighed 115 pounds, which is technically slightly underweight, but it was barely noticeable. At this time, my mom sent me on a month long study abroad in Spain, and that was when my ED really took over (this is a good thing, in my opinion!!). I was eating about 800 calories a day, and about 3 days a week I would go jogging. When I came home I weighed 104 pounds! I was sent to a nutritionist, which was really scary, but I was totally able to cheat the system. I gained up to 111, but it wasn't even noticeable!
That summer I went back to Spain with my family and my mom just didn't have the bandwidth to deal with all my eating issues. I got to 98 pounds! When I got home, my heart rate was super low and my doctor freaked out. I was slowly gaining weight, until it dawned upon me that I was eating a lot and hardly gaining anything. And that's when the binges started.
I would eat late at night, tons of tortillas, Greek yogurt, bagels, and granola bars. I packed on the pounds. I remember getting up to 118, which is just 1 pounds over the underweight line, and thinking I was so obese. Little did I know that I would pack on 20 more pounds.
The more weight I gained, the worse I felt about myself. And the worse I felt, the more I ate. It was a horribly vicious cycle that left me on two 5150's, scars on my left arm, and 44 pounds heavier than my lowest weight. No matter how hard I tried, I could not lose. I was so miserable.
Now, I'm gradually losing weight. (Down to 134!) I'm back in Spain and my anorexia is flaring back up, which is the best!! I am so honored and blessed <3
I'm determined to keep my weight (and yours!) continuing in a downward trend :)
I felt and looked so great, that I strove for more. That spring, I began counting calories and becoming pretty obsessive about food. My parents noticed, but they didn't take it very seriously since I was still at a perfectly healthy weight.
By Easter I weighed 115 pounds, which is technically slightly underweight, but it was barely noticeable. At this time, my mom sent me on a month long study abroad in Spain, and that was when my ED really took over (this is a good thing, in my opinion!!). I was eating about 800 calories a day, and about 3 days a week I would go jogging. When I came home I weighed 104 pounds! I was sent to a nutritionist, which was really scary, but I was totally able to cheat the system. I gained up to 111, but it wasn't even noticeable!
That summer I went back to Spain with my family and my mom just didn't have the bandwidth to deal with all my eating issues. I got to 98 pounds! When I got home, my heart rate was super low and my doctor freaked out. I was slowly gaining weight, until it dawned upon me that I was eating a lot and hardly gaining anything. And that's when the binges started.
I would eat late at night, tons of tortillas, Greek yogurt, bagels, and granola bars. I packed on the pounds. I remember getting up to 118, which is just 1 pounds over the underweight line, and thinking I was so obese. Little did I know that I would pack on 20 more pounds.
The more weight I gained, the worse I felt about myself. And the worse I felt, the more I ate. It was a horribly vicious cycle that left me on two 5150's, scars on my left arm, and 44 pounds heavier than my lowest weight. No matter how hard I tried, I could not lose. I was so miserable.
Now, I'm gradually losing weight. (Down to 134!) I'm back in Spain and my anorexia is flaring back up, which is the best!! I am so honored and blessed <3
I'm determined to keep my weight (and yours!) continuing in a downward trend :)